Ever think about the stories you tell yourself? The way you speak to yourself and the words you use? Emily Prendiville spoke to a group of financial advisors and benefits advisors in Phoenix, Arizona about how to up-level our self-talk and rewrite our stories.

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Transcript of Video

I attended a certification session in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) in London. The purpose of NLP is to help people move through things that are holding them back. Talk about the language we speak to ourselves!

It’s amazing how many times we tell ourselves we’re not good enough, we can’t do that or we didn’t do a good enough job.

Step one is recognizing the language we speak to ourselves.

For most of our lifetimes, science has taught us that we’re hard-wired, that we carry stuff from our childhood and that’s just the way it is. It affects and is the basis for judgment in all the decisions that we make in our lives.

But, new science has shown how flexible and pliable our brain really is if we learn how to teach it. It’s the language that we speak to our mind that determines our outcomes.

We are told who we are and what we’re good at or not good at and those are the stories we keep. We’re not just talking to our conscious minds but our subconscious minds, which is where the real power is.

It’s fascinating when we change the language we use, how we’re able to move through our past beliefs and what we were told into a new place that opens up possibilities.  At the NLP certification, we learned how to eliminate for someone something that might be holding them back and learn how to replace it with what they would like to have their interpretation of a situation be.

Sometimes we get into situations as advisors where we paralyze ourselves for things that happened in the past. The good thing about the past is, it’s in the past. It’s still part of us, but it’s in the past. I asked one of the advisors I coach who was struggling with a past situation to create a vision of how he’d rather feel in the situation. After working with him for just 20 minutes, he told me that he was able to see how bright his future was and how his present was informing his future and the past couldn’t catch up with him.

I’ve been stuck many times in this career, even when I was making more money than I ever thought possible. I started to say “I’m making too much money. I’m just not working hard enough. I don’t deserve this.” Isn’t that a weird thing? Why would I say that to myself?

The way my career has changed is beyond my wildest dreams. To be able to work with advisors around the country was part of my thought process in the beginning. Now, I ask myself what else can I do, how can I give back, can I impact the entire insurance industry because that’s what I’d really like to do, to be that impactful.